I Am Science

To the tune of “I Am Woman”

I am science, hear me roar.

They gave me power you can’t ignore.

Oh, I know so much, but it’s really all pretend.

I might be a tiresome bore,

But I’ve got you on the floor,

And I know it feels to you like it won’t end.

Yes, I’m so wise;

Don’t you know I feel your pain?

Yes, you’ve paid a price,

But look how much I’ve gained.

I can make you do almost anything.

Often wrong (wrong),

I push Remdesivir (Remdesevir),

But I’m science.

Give me time and I will break you,

Force your doctors to forsake you,

More determined to achieve our final goal,

As we clamp down ever stronger,

Make you cry, “Oh, how much longer?”

Let you see what those can do who have no soul.

Yes, I’m so wise;

Don’t you know I feel your pain?

Yes, you’ve paid a price,

But look how much I’ve gained.

I can make you do almost anything.

Often wrong (wrong),

I push Remdesivir (Remdesevir),

But I’m science.

I am science, you should know

As you take my every blow,

And I spread my reign of fear across the land.

A tough row I have to hoe,

And you all want me to go,

But I have a job that you can’t understand.

Yes, I’m so wise;

Don’t you know I feel your pain?

Yes, you’ve paid a price,

But look how much I’ve gained.

I can make you do almost anything.

Often wrong (wrong),

Reprehensible (Reprehensible),

But I’m science.

(Reprehensible [science])

David Martin

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